Love Birds

Hey Everyone, So today has been a rough one.. you know the one, the day where you can't stop crying or you can't stop hurting? Any way, I don't know what it is about Easter but I always seem to miss Gabriel more, and now that I'm pregnant with Audrie and she is almost where I was when I lost Gabriel, I find myself thinking about him even more. So I guess this is less of a "hey world, here I am" post and more of a "sending my thoughts to Heaven and Gabriel" post so here goes that... Dear Gabriel.. I thought of you today, I think of you every day. The moments we could of had with you, how old you would be, did I do the right thing in having you when I did. Most days I get by, I can fight... Today, I lost... I thought about a few things but with Easter I also thought about the Savior and this is what I decided. No one in the WORLD understands that the pictures I take at the grave mean everything to me because they are the only ones I can ...

Hey Everyone,             I feel like every time I come on here to start one of these posts my head and my heart and my hands are all fighting each other to get all the words in and to get them right. For a while I've had a thought in my mind and I keep thinking "I need to write, I need to write!" Then life happens and I forget but now while Theo sleeps and Liam plays, I want to talk about this thought, this subject... Moments.             This month has been hard for a lot more than just one reason but I feel like a lot of it is just life. We have trials, than pure happiness you didn't know you could have, then sadness you never thought you could feel, then boredom strikes, the days where you have so much to do and NO energy to do it, and then there is this day, maybe even just this hour or minute where you look around and think "wow, God loves me SO much to bless me with all of this" these, all of these, have been my mont...

Alright Everyone, I feel like I should let you know, this is going to be a bit of a long post but hey, I'm blessed to have so many people in my life to be grateful for and with Thanksgiving being tomorrow, I couldn't just let the opportunity pass to tell those people how much I love them so here goes!! Well, I have to of course start with these beautiful people! They did after all bring me into this world! :)  Mom: I swear I could talk about you for days! You are SO much more than just a mother to me, you are one of my absolute best friends! You love me on the days I'm grumpy, you are patient enough to sit through my rants and help me feel better, you are an amazing grandma to my kiddos, and you're always willing to help people around you. You always put people's needs before your own and you never do it looking for praise or to be put in a spotlight. You are so great and I seriously can't imagine my life with out you! You taught me how to be selfles...

You'd think this would be an easy one, you post a picture, you say we're expecting or something fun and that's that.. this is different.     This is our new addition, Liam likes to call it Bean Bean and we decided it kind of stuck. So, this is Bean Bean. For some close family and close friends, you already knew about this but unlike Liam and unlike Gabriel, this was hard for me to post. Don't get me wrong, I can't even tell you how excited I am for another baby!! But I felt like I couldn't just post a picture and say "yup, here we are" I had mixed feelings. I  remember  wanting to wait with Gabriel, I told myself I wanted to wait until I "knew I wouldn't miscarry" until I "knew it was safe" but I've realized that every life is precious and I'm really glad we celebrated Gabriel no mater how short a life he had and I can't imagine going through all we did with out the support we got. So I moved past tha...

If you told me five years ago about half my trials I would experience just in this year, I would tell you that you have the wrong person, I'd tell you I'm not strong enough and there's just no way. Then if you told me about a year after that, I'd tell you I could maybe deal with those trials but only because I met a man, a man that I ended up marrying and who helps me through every trial in my life with a caring heart for me and a never ending faith. Then, as if I wasn't lucky enough to catch such a great guy, three years ago today, he chose me to have for eternity. I get this amazing man for all of this life and then forever! I remember that day like yesterday... maybe even better than that ;) I remember there was A LOT of things on that day that probably could have stressed me out, but some how they just didn't seem to mater, I remember that we had a dinner set up (since we got sealed later in the day) and on our actual wedding day I was worried about all thos...